Pi Diagram

Ok, so I’m really sorry I haven’t been able to post lately.

[What have I been up to, you ask? I’ve been GRE-ing, freshmen-advising, and researching].

You know how I did an entry once on philosophers and their guilt? It’s wearing off on me!!!! I really feel so guilty every day that I do not post.

To assuage said guilt, I created this diagram a while ago after watching the movie Pi. If you don’t get it, that’s ok. It’s kind of lame anyway. 

Fake story behind this weird diagram: I was following a bunch of philosophers around and charting their exact activities (because everything I do is measured and exact), and suddenly I realized that, if you chart the data and create complex mathematical equations, philosopher-activities follow a spiral pattern! It all goes back to pi (as in 3.14 . . .).

[click on the image to enlarge it]

Ok, really . . . I disliked this movie . . . and I'm not a mathematician or a scientist. 

I’m answering questions in my spare moments. I almost have another set worked up.

~ The Philosiologist [with a guilty red face]

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), add me to your circle on Google+ (Philosiologist Qed) [I am so cool], or send me an email (left sidebar).  If you are a famous academic and would like to write me a fantastic letter of recommendation for grad school apps (I’m not doing Philosophy), please feel free to offer your services in an email. I need all the help I can get.

Answer Set #1

[Gosh! Finally!] 

It has been a long time in the blog-world, but I am back after an unintentional blogging hiatus. Not only am I back, but I am answering your questions.

Over the next few days I will be posting answer blogs.  I am intending to group these questions by theme. I heartily welcome discussion to these answers, especially in circumstances where my answer to a question is to open the floor to philosophers/non-philosophers (obviously, there are many times when you have much more wisdom or insight than me).

So, let’s proceed with our first batch of questions.

Question 1

How would a friend/spouse/family member best broach the subject of jobs and money? Some philosophers complete their schooling and are content to spend their days reading, writing, researching, and working on projects without actually being employed or actively searching for a job. This may seem fine for a while but after several years, you would think survival mode would kick in and they would make finding a job a priority. Curiously, this is not the case with my philosopher. I've tried unsucessfully (and sucessfully) to talk to him about it. While he agrees that it is time to get a job, he still hasn't actually looked or applied for one. Is this a common problem among the philosopher community? How might I inspire him to start working?

Answer

Several things could be at work here.

1. Philosophers have a hard time transitioning back to the “real world” after they’ve been submerged in philosophy for a while. They got into philosophy because, as you mentioned, they are so happy when they are “reading, writing, researching, and working on projects.” The fact that they may have to enter a realm where people are not interested in these same pursuits is depressing and overwhelming.

2. Your philosopher might not be looking for an academic philosophy job for the terrible (but all too real) reason that there are so few jobs available in philosophy. Perhaps your philosopher looked around a bit but returned dissatisfied and with the resolution to wait it out for a bit. Job prospects (the ideal, tenure-track kind) for philosophers are very slim.

3. It might be a good idea to ask your philosopher if you can discuss the reasons behind why he is so reluctant to look for a job. Perhaps your philosopher is too overwhelmed with the kinds of “real world” jobs on the market and needs some direction. Perhaps they are just hunkering down and waiting for someone they know in the field to recommend them for an interview. Perhaps your philosopher is just really depressed at his prospects.

I would recommend encouraging your philosopher to start applying for some jobs, with the promise that you will back them up if they want to enroll in additional philosophy courses on the side and if you remind them that entering the non-philosophy world is not the end of their philosophy dreams. They can still attend lectures, classes and conferences. Perhaps your philosopher thinks that committing to a normal job means the end of their philosophical study. Assure them that this is not the end! If your philosopher would like to get back into the academic philosophy world, encourage them to work hard on some of the projects they used to work on or are interested in working on.

Question 2

How do Philosophers "rest their brains"? i.e. they spend so much time thinking... so how do they stop and relax for a bit?

Answer

The philosophers I’ve met have a wide array of different hobbies and interests outside of philosophy, just like you and me.  Here are a few of the most common ways that philosophers rest their brains:

1. Video games: This is not a gender-biased observation, as I know many male and female philosophers who ‘game. Video games give philosophers a chance to do something with a different part of their minds.

2. Socialize: Philosophers love to get together for dinner, parties, and drinking. While they will often get together with other philosophers, they tend to either talk about “fun” philosophy things or normal-person things.

3. Attend concerts: If you live in a city with a decent local music scene, you will find many philosophers in attendance at such events.

4. Drink: Whatever their brew, philosophers enjoy drinking (coffee, tea, alcohol, etc). While they use these stimulants to work, they also use them to relax.

5. Read books: My philosopher always has 5-10 non-philosophy books  that he is reading at one time—even during the busiest seasons. Philosophers love knowledge, and reading is an easy way to gain more knowledge.

Question 3

Philosophers and pets: If we are mostly incapable of feeding ourselves (clearly a spot-on observation), how is it that we all seem to live with cats?

Answer

Ah, yes, the cat question. Pets, especially cats, are very persistent creatures when it comes to things like eating and needing the litterbox cleaned (or needing to go outside). I don’t ever have to tell my cat, “Hey, aren’t you getting hungry?” My cat has made it his personal duty to remind me every time I walk by his food bowl that it is dinner time.

I can see pets adjusting to philosophers and their absent-mindedness extremely well, actually. If a philosopher does not remember the last time that they fed the cat and the cat acts hungry, then they will probably feed the cat, which the cat will quickly figure out and use to her/his advantage (resulting in a very fat, but happy, feline).

Philosophers may not notice their own bodily sensations of hunger, but they will notice a pet that trips them or yowls mournfully near a food bowl or at a door (and if you don’t clean out the litterbox, then a cat will make it very clear to you that it is well past time to do so).

Philosophers, anything to add?

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). You can also write me an email (left sidebar). 

~The Philosiologist

Q&A Submission Time

Some of you have sent me email questions about philosophers over the past few months, which I believe I’ve already answered (if I haven’t yet, shame on me!). While I hope that this has been helpful for you, you often have really good questions that more people could probably also benefit from. One reader had the great idea of asking me to create an entry specifically for questions, which I will answer.

[Note: No previously submitted questions over private messages will be included, to preserve privacy].

So, if you have a question, either about philosophers or about non-philosophers (for example, how might we react in situation X, or what are we thinking in situation Y, or how should you respond in situation Z, etc), please comment with them below or submit them over facebook under the link for this article. Philosophers and non-philosophers can participate in this Q&A time.

If you send me a question over email or in a private message, I will only post it here if you tell me specifically that you would like it posted. I want to keep private questions private, to protect my readers.

If you ask questions about me, I will probably answer them untruthfully, but my answers will be creative. This blog is not about me.

You have until the end of the day on Monday, June 13, [I mean, June 20th], to submit questions. I will answer them all in a subsequent blog post (s).

Happy questioning.

[Note: as I write this post, I realize that it could fail miserably. If there are no questions submitted, then I will make up my own, as sad and pathetic as it might be].

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). I also respond to email messages (left sidebar).

~The Philosiologist

What do Philosophers Consume?

This chart is a 100%, scientific, and accurate* representation of what philosophers consume when left unattended.

(Click on the image to enlarge it).

I hope this helps. You may want to intervene and present your philosopher with nutrient-rich meals every once and a while.

P.S. Anyone interested in a Q&A blog; particularly one where philosophers can ask questions about non-philosophers?

* By "100%, scientific, and accurate," I mean, of course, that some philosophers are like this and some aren't. This note is for the concerned parties amongst the readers.

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me an email if you like (left sidebar).

~The Philosiologist

Philosophers in Love: Where to Find a Philosopher

So, let's assume that after all of these blog posts on philosophers, you simply have to go out and find yourself a philosopher of your very own. Where might you find one? I've created a graph that might help you in your endeavors.

[Note: This graph is also useful if you have a philosopher, but you've misplaced her/him somehow].

Click on the graph to make it larger.

This is, of course, super-scientific, so please interpret this graph as if it is 100% accurate. [Note: Sarcasm alert!! This is for you, next anonymous commenter who reminds me that all philosophers are unique snowflakes].

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). I also usually answer emails eventually (left sidebar). If you have an offspring or are an offspring of a philosopher and would like to recommend your offspring to write/write a guest blog post about what it's like to be a philosopher's offspring, please send me an email or fb message.

~Philosiologist

Philosophers in Love: Happy Philosophers

Non-philosophers sometimes assume that because their philosopher is a complex person, that all of their tastes and desires must be complex. This is false. Philosophers do have some complexities in taste, but there are several, very simple things that make philosophers happy. If you are in a relationship with a philosopher, you may discover that they really appreciate these simple pleasures. Here are some of them that I’ve discovered:

1. A reading chair and a work space.

Philosophers do not need huge rooms or fancy furniture, all they need is a comfy place to read (preferably with a table for caffeinated beverages/alcohol and a bookshelf close by) and a sufficient place to do work. When my philosopher and I got our first place, we spent lots of time looking for just the right desk and reading chair. Because of the time we took to find the right furniture, my philosopher is perfectly content and happy to work at home.

2. Invest in a nice coffee maker.

Philosophers generally do not like bad coffee. Encourage them to do some research (philosophers are very good at researching things) to find just the kind of coffee maker they want, then purchase it. Simple, right?

3. Be prepared to invest in “good” coffee.

Once your philosopher gets a nice coffee maker, it would be a sin to make poor quality coffee in this coffee maker. Your philosopher will want to start purchasing good coffee (example: we buy a fair-trade, organic, locally roasted coffee). If your philosopher does not like coffee, perhaps they like tea or alcohol. Invest in quality beverages.

4. Surprise your philosopher by asking them about their research.

Philosophers love talking about their research. It helps if you try to learn a bit about philosophy on your own first, but once you know a little bit, you may even discover that your philosopher’s research subject is rather interesting. I recommend asking them a question like this, “I would love to know more about your research. Are there any parts of it that I might find interesting?” This will make your philosopher very happy (unless they are of the impatient, “Don’t bother me while I work” type). See my post on How to Get Your Philosopher Talking Without Much Effort.

5. Surprise your philosopher with food.

Philosophers are often too distracted to remember to eat food, let alone good food. If your philosopher is a graduate student, she/he will already be a scrounger (one who scrounges for free food), due to the nature of their poverty. Surprise your philosopher with baked goods, dinners out, and favorite snacks.

This is it, really. Some philosophers might like particular gifts or might like to take short road trips, but most philosophers I know also like a few simple things. 

Any other simple pleasures I've missed? [Note: Keep it clean, please! Some of your children read this blog :-)]

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). I also usually answer emails (left sidebar). 

~The Philosiologist

Philosophers in Love: Funny Things about Living with a Philosopher

"A wonderful fact to reflect upon, that every human creature is constituted to be that profound secret and mystery to every other."

- From Charles Dickens’ A Tale of Two Cities

Philosophers, being rather strange in many ways (delightfully strange, in my opinion), are very interesting beings to live with. Here are a few strange things I’ve noticed in the few years I’ve lived with my philosopher.

1. Books everywhere.

I like to joke that in our apartment, I can’t ever escape my philosopher’s dissertation project. There are books for this everywhere: bathroom, kitchen, under various chairs, stacked beside the bed. Sometimes I even find his books in my bags.

2. Thinking-hours are kept; not regular hours.

Thinking-hours can be at any time of the day/night. Some philosophers do their best thinking at 2am. Getting used to these strange hours can be cause for some grievous misunderstandings at first, but after a while you learn to adjust to them.

3. Strange eating/drinking habits.

Most philosophers forget to eat when they work, but they do not usually forget to drink, particularly caffeinated beverages. Philosophers can drink amazing amounts of caffeinated beverages when they are working. At my philosopher’s peak, be was consuming two-and-a-half, 12-ounce pots of coffee per day. Because my philosopher will not eat lunch when I’m not there to remind him, I set up a schedule where we always eat lunch together.

4. Forgetting strange things.

You may find your philosopher forgetting strange things like (1) washing the shampoo out of their hair, (2) how to get home, (3) to close cupboards, (4) to go to bed, (5) to match socks before they put them on, (6) to turn in super-important paperwork, (7) to close the front door quickly at night so freakishly large palmetto bugs (huge cockroaches) don’t fly into the apartment.

It is very easy to keep yourself from being frustrated by these oddities by viewing your philosopher as an anthropologist would (noticing what they do and interpreting it as a part of their culture, rather than viewing it as an annoyance to be corrected). Personally, I love these quirks. Philosophers make my life much more interesting than it would be otherwise.

5. The ability to talk about things (especially philosophy) at all times.

Philosophers are very good questions-askers and talkers about many things—normal-person things and philosophy.  This does not mean that they are always the best listeners, but this quirk can be worked on. Persons like myself who are not very good talkers can find philosophers delightful beings to share a relationship with, except when they cross lines at times when we would rather have peace. No-talking boundaries are easy to erect with philosophers, though, as they are very sensitive to your rejection of their ideas. As I’ve mentioned in previous entries, a simple, “I’m not feeling up to talking about this right now, but I would be willing to discuss it [at X time],” Is sufficient.  It is wonderful to share a life with a person who likes to talk about interesting things all the time.

Please feel free to share any philosopher-oddities you’ve seen.

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me an email, if you would like (left sidebar). Stay tuned for more in my mini-series this week, Philosophers in Love.

~The Philosiologist