philosiology

Small and Non-Exhaustive Academic Dictionary: Philosopher Edition

2012-03-03T09:32:00.000-08:00

[Brief note: Yourphilosiologist is currently in that weird state of consciousness, which onlycomes about by being both on serious cold medicine and strong coffee at thesame time. Forgive me for any strangeness today].

[Brief note #2: I willbe out of town next week and may or may not compose my usual weekly entry onSaturday. I will be on a grad school visit—so excited!!!—so every single secondof my day will probably be occupied with discussions, questions, and attemptsto not embarrass myself. I will try to make it up to all of you with a postafter I return].

[Brief note #3: I amso sorry that this post is so much more boring than usual. I am too nervous toreally think about anything related to philosophy. Right now, I’m usually allof my powers to memorize key information about the department I’ll be visitingthis week].

If you are in some sort of relationship with an academicphilosopher (or an academic of any type), you will eventually need to know someof the “university lingo,” especially if you are coexisting with a philosopher.To save you some embarrassment, I’ve compiled some definitions of words thrownabout in academia, and what they should mean to you.

1. Post-doctorate(post-doc): Usually a one-year, paid position in a department where theperson does not have any teaching responsibilities but they have finished theirPhD and are expected to publish, publish, publish. The goal is to use this yearto get oneself into a better position in the job market. Being a post-doc iskind of fun, but the post-doc will be under constant scrutiny (and, thus, anxiety).The competition for these positions is intense, but not as intense as atenure-track job. Earning a post-doc can elevate an academic’s job prospects,which is why an academic might turn down a tenure-track position to take apost-doc, as they are sure that they could get a better position aftercompleting the post-doc.

2. Tenure: Thecoveted position and eventual goal of most academics in the university. Whenone earns tenure (after years of hard work), one is almost guaranteed that theywill not be fired. Tenure = the ultimate job security. This is different thantenure in K-12 education, as university tenure requires so much more of aperson, even after they receive tenure. The process to tenure usually goes asfollows:

a. Student finishes Ph.D. Perhaps takesa post-doc or goes directly into the job market.

b. Ph.D. or post-doc is hired as anAssistant Professor on a tenure-track.

c. Assistant Professor works hard to publish and give papers atconferences for 6-ish years (with few committee responsibilities). They prepareand submit a huge portfolio of their work to a committee who reviews it in along process. If the Assistant Prof “passes,” they earn tenure and are promotedto Associate Professor. If they “fail,” they are usually fired and live therest of their lives with the shame of not earning tenure (and have littlechance of ever landing another TT job).

d. The Associate Professor works even harder and is given morecommittee assignments.

e. An academic can be an Associate Professor for an indefiniteperiod (or for the rest of their career, if they wish). If they choose, theycan work hard to be promoted to Professor (by the same process, with no dangerof firing), which means a higher pay scale and more committee assignments (andmore prestige, more ability to publish, and fewer teaching assignments, as wellas more grad students to supervise).

3. Tenure-TrackPosition (TT): A position that puts a person on the track to tenure.Without being hired on this track, a person cannot earn tenure.

4. Non-Tenure TrackPosition (NTT): A position that does not include career advancement ortenure. Person may be “re-hired” on a tenure-track eventually, but it is notlikely. NTT positions pay much less than TT positions.

5. VisitingProfessor: A NTT position. Sometimes, an academic will take this positionin hopes that they can impress their colleagues enough to receive a TT offer.This is rare, and Visiting Professors generally end up doing lots of work(teaching) for very little pay and no assurance of tenure.

6. Annual Review:Most universities require that department heads/chairs look over the work,teaching, and service that each professor in the department has done in a year.These are important to make sure that work is distributed appropriately andthat TT professors are on track to tenure.

7. FacultyDevelopment Leave (FDL): Usually time off that is paid for by theuniversity. A professor is supposed to use this time to publish ferociously.Most faculty take this time when they are working on a book. Indeed, if youread the acknowledgments of most philosophy books, they will thank a universityor foundation for supporting them during FDL, which implies that it isextremely difficult to invest the time it takes to write a book without timeoff.

8. Jobs for Philosophers (JFP): An annualpublication by the American Philosophical Association where institutionsadvertise any academic positions in their philosophy department. This hasalways been published on paper (it looks like a small newspaper), but JFP hasbeen recently added online, too, though most philosophers believe that both theonline and paper additions are poorly done. This does not keep job-seekers fromordering the paper or checking online.

These aren’t specific to philosophers, per se (except forJFP), but they are really important things to understand as your philosopherprogresses in academia. So next time you wonder why your newly hired AssistantProfessor friend (on a TT) seems so stressed out (after all, they just got asweet job, which is really hard to do in philosophy!), remember that they’vegot a long way to go before they earn some job security.

~The Philosiologist

You can follow me on twitter (@Philosiologist), friend me onfacebook (Philosiologist Qed), or add me to your circle on Google+(Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me an email (left sidebar).

Three Philosophers: How to Address Break-Taking

2012-02-25T10:38:00.002-08:00

One of the most common questions (sometimes asked jokinglyand sometimes seriously) non-philosophers ask of me is how to get philosophersout of their books and articles and into the outside world sometimes. I’vedanced around the issue for a while, addressing the issue in bits and pieces(such as my post on habitualness),but today let’s address it outright.

How can I make my philosopher go outside once and while?

I believe that what this question really infers is that (1)being tied up in one’s work all the time is unhealthy and (2) that philosophersnever want to leave their workbehind and take a break.

Before we proceed any further, I want to get clear onsomething. I believe that there are three types of philosophers in academicphilosophy, and these types of philosophers respond differently to suggestionsfrom us that they leave their work and take a break.

[Note: The mostinteresting part of this study is that it doesn’t matter what type ofphilosophy that your philosopher is in or how successful they are—these threetypes of philosophers are found across the field in all levels/types ofphilosophy].

Philosopher #1:Philosophy is Everything

This is not the most common type of philosopher, but it isthe type we usually think of when we think about philosophers. The PEphilosopher really only wants to think about, talk about, study, and breathephilosophy. The PE philosopher doesn’t have many interests outside ofphilosophy, because everything else just seems so bland, unpredictable, and/ormeaningless. If the PE philosopher does have other interests, they willprobably only have one or two, and they have somehow become experts in theseinterests.

If you were to suggest to the PE philosopher that they takea break from their work and try out some new interest, this philosopher becomesvery baffled. “Why,” they might ask, “should I try doing something that doesnot interest me at all, when there is such interesting reading to be found inthis book?” This PE philosopher is really, really happy in philosophy.

Philosopher #2: Philosophyis Compartmentalized

Surprisingly, this is actually one of the most common typesof philosophers I’ve encountered. The PC philosopher has the ability toabsolutely devote themselves to philosophy at certain times, and then at allother moments of their lives they do not talk about or interact with philosophyat all (they compartmentalize philosophy and other interests).

This type of philosopher tends to be interested in thingsthat are completely different than philosophy. For example, the PC philosophermight spend a lot of time in physical activities, such as competitive dancing,biking, marathon-running, rock-climbing, or hiking. Some of the PC philosophersare really into pop-culture stuff, like entertainment, horror movies, and comicbooks. It might even look—to the untrained, non-philosopher eye—that the PCphilosopher is not even really a philosopher at all (“When do they get theirwork done!”). The PC philosopher, though, can get down to work and getpages and pages of technical, difficult work done in a very short amount oftime. Some of the most successful philosophers I’ve met are actually PCphilosophers.

I don’t know that you would even broach the idea of taking abreak from work with this type of philosopher, as they don’t usually seem thatbusy. If they do seem really busy, it’s often because they’ve put off theirphilosophy work until the last minute (and then manage to whip out somemasterpiece in three hours).

Philosopher #3:Philosophy is Another Interest

The PAI philosopher is interested in just about everything—everything,that is, that is written about academically in books. [My philosopher is actually this type of philosopher]. This type ofphilosopher is even harder to get “outdoors” than the PE philosopher, becausethey find all of their joy and satisfaction in reading, listening to lectures,and watching documentaries about everything.Their interests have to correspond in some way to cognitive development. ThisPAI philosopher just sees philosophy as one game among many on the cognitivespectrum; it just happens to be the game they are best at right now.

The PAI philosopher responds to the suggestion to leavetheir cognitive activities behind with perplexity. “The world in books is sointeresting. I need to know everything. How can doing thisactivity increase my knowledge?” The PAI philosopher can be “bribed” to go outwith the promise of a trip to a bookstore or library, or the permission toorder a new book online.

In conclusion, I do believe it is healthy to take a break ofsorts from academic work at times (just consider what happened to JS Mill inhis early twenties!), but philosophers are different and will respond to suchrequests with different reactions. You may find that you need to promise yourparticipation in a philosophical discussion with the PE philosopher or let thePAI philosopher peruse some books at the conclusion of a new activity.

~The Philosiologist

You can follow me ontwitter (@Philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), or addme to your circle on Google+ (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me anemail (left sidebar).

The Waiting Period: Graduate Admissions Survival

2012-02-18T10:23:00.001-08:00

If you have a philosopher who happens to have applied tograduate schools this year, you are likely in thick of waiting. This waitingperiod is almost always intensely stressful for both you and your philosopher.

Depression during this waiting period can be exasperated by yourphilosopher, especially if they persist in checking their email frequently orif they insist on monitoring acceptances/rejections on online forums (such asgradcafe). This is especially dangerous for philosophers who are also workingon MA theses (it’s the worst kind of distraction from work).

So how can you help alleviate the depressive effects of theapplication waiting period?

1. Make an alternateplan.

This may seem rather dreadful, but it will help both you andyour philosopher if you develop a backup plan (what to do if your philosopherdoesn’t get in anywhere). If your philosopher knows that they have alternateoptions—even if these aren’t ideal—then it might ease their mind a bit. Forsure, having a backup plan can also do wonders for your mental health.

2. Reassure.Reassure. Reassure.

You will find yourself having to do lots of reassuringduring this period. Prepare to be patient with your philosopher every time theydescend into the slough of despond. Reassure your philosopher that they arereally intelligent, they haven’t heard from every school yet, just becausesomeone has been accepted on gradcafe doesn’t mean that all decisions arefinal, just because they didn’t get in this year doesn’t mean that they cannever try again, etc. Just because they didn’t get into one of their lower-tierschools, doesn’t mean that they won’t get into an upper-tier school. Remindthem. Here are two stories that might help your philosopher:

Story 1: A philosopher thought they had received rejectionsfrom every school to which they applied, as they had seen people post ongradcafe about each of their schools. Well guess what? An oversight had led toan acceptance letter—from their first school choice—either not being sent orbeing lost in the mail.

Story 2: An extremely intelligent philosopher receivedrejections from every place they applied one year. Instead of giving up, thisphilosopher applied to exactly the same places the next year and got in toseveral of them.

3. Bake treats.

This speaks for itself.

4. Distract yourphilosopher.

This is a good time to ply your philosopher withdistractions. Help them train for a marathon; make a goal to watch all of theAFI top 100 movies; encourage them to prepare a paper for publication; refinishsome furniture. Distractions are really necessary to keep your philosopher frombeing despondent sometimes.

When all else fails, direct them to Ph.D. comics.

~The Philosiologist

You can follow me ontwitter (@Philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), or addme to your circle on Google+ (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me anemail (left sidebar).

Special Valentines' Day Post

2012-02-14T07:39:00.000-08:00

I have a special entry today, for all you lovers ofphilosophers. First, I thought it might be fun to play a game I like to call“Poetry alterations in the name of parody.” Without further ado, Percy Bysshe Shelley’s“To Harriet” (from“Queen Mab: A Philosophical Poem”), altered [alterations in brackets].

[Imagine that this is a philosopher, speaking to Philosophy(n)].

“To [Philosophy]”

WHOSE is the [tenured university position] that, gleamingthrough the world,

Wards off thepoisonous arrow of its scorn?

Whose is thewarm and partial praise,

Virtue's mostsweet reward?

Beneath whose[books] did my reviving soul

Riper in truth andvirtuous daring grow?

Whose[syllogisms] have I gazed fondly on,

And lovedmankind the more?

[Philosophy]! onthine:--thou wert my purer mind;

Thou wert theinspiration of my song;

Thine arethese early wilding [articles in excellent journals],

Thoughgarlanded by me.

Then press into thybreast this pledge of love;

And know, thoughtime may change and years may roll,

Each [invitedconference-lecture] gathered in my heart

It consecratesto thine.

Now that I’ve butchered Shelley (shivering), I thought itmight be fun to return to some of your questions. Remember that entry, way backin June, where I askedfor questions from you to answer in a series of blog posts? Yeah, I neverreally got to all of them. Some of your questions were about relationships,either with philosophers or non-philosophers, so today seems like the sort ofday where I should answer a few of them.

[Disclaimer: I am notan expert in love, but I am an expert in loving philosophers].

Do you have anythoughts on how a philosopher might present himself as to be more appealing quaphilosopher to the opposite sex? (I'm guessing hint #1 would be "Stop using'qua'!") I am most interested in a male philosopher appealing to females,but any thoughts on other permutations of the same issue would certainly bevery interesting.

I’m having flashbacks of myself as a young teenager(awkwardly unattractive), reading all the books and articles I could find aboutmaking oneself attractive to a particular gender/subgroup of gender.

Very simply: there is not one universal way to make yourselfmore appealing to a group of people—no matter what gender or sexual orientation.Sure, you could go the physical route and try to win a date on your looksalone, but your looks will fade and your brilliant, philosophical mind willnot.

Have you ever read J.S. & Harriet Mill’s On the Subjection of Women? In thistext, the Mills say something to the effect of “Look, you can’t reallyunderstand a woman or womanhood until you understand all women—from differentethnicities, time periods, locations, at different occupations. The meagerunderstanding that you have of women is based on your idea of who they are and what they should be.”

Now that my Mill-studying philosopher is cringing at myparaphrasing, in summation: Every woman is different. I can’t tell you how toattract a woman because each of us is attracted to different things.

If you want to attract a significant other, try to be inplaces where you will interact with all sorts of women. Join a book group. Beyourself. You will find that there are women out there who are not turned-offby philosophers, even if they use strange words and make us qualify everystatement. Don’t spend your life trying to attract women—try to interact withand understand them. The rest will fall into place.

I was wondering whatdrew you to your philosopher. As a philosophy student, I often have a hard timeconnecting with people on a romantic level. And I've heard, from past romanticpartners, that I'm often too logical and realistic, i.e., I'm not optimisticenough and I don't let myself fall in love as fast as they do. I know a lot ofmy colleagues feel the same as I do when it comes to a romantic relationship.So I just assume our philosophy training often gets in the way of having aromantic relationship, e.g., we over think things, or approach love verylogically. Was your philosopher like this at first? If so, how did you stick itout?! Or are you exactly like your philosopher, to where it was not a problem?Hope this all made sense. I don't want to generalize that all philosophers arelike this, but about 70% of my colleagues have discussed, and seem to have, thesame problem. This is of course applied to dating a non-philosopher. I don'tthink we have ANY problems dating a philosopher :)

Short Answer.

I was attracted to the following qualities: his quick mind,his sense of humor, the ability he had to talk to anyone, his penchant for longand meaningful conversations, the amount of literature he had read, his blog,and (superficially) he was just the right height.

Long Answer.

My philosopher and I met in college, but we did not considerdating until a mutual friend convinced us that we would be a great match. Heinvited me to book club. After one night watching him at book club (andsubsequent conversations in person and over email), I wanted to date him.

I am a practical person—pretty steady, though hot-headedabout some things. When my philosopherand I began dating, I was less practical and extremely shy. He is definitelymore even-keeled and logical than me (it should be noted that he is an analyticphilosopher). He was logical and careful from the beginning, but I alwaysreally liked it because I knew that he wouldn’t do anything irrational (he wasa safe person).

One smart thing that my philosopher did was that he tried tobe gentle with me (philosophically) at the beginning. It’s not that I couldn’thandle it or that I was less intelligent than him, but he wisely recognizedthat turning on the philosophy full force at the beginning—when I was not used totalking and reasoning in the same way, as I had not had his training—would makeme defensive. He started with dropping in small moral dilemmas, and then workedup to harder stuff. I wouldn’t say that my philosopher was untrue to himself by“going slow” with philosophy, either.

One of the things my philosopher did (and still does,actually), is “test the waters” every so often with new bits of philosophy. Hefrequently asks me for permission before engaging me in philosophicaldiscussion, and then we debrief at the end. These extra steps that he takesreally keep me from feeling attacked, and they leave me with a better taste inmy mouth about philosophy. This also works to my philosopher’s advantage, as ifI feel better about philosophy, I will be more likely to “put up” with morephilosophical discussions.

We spent almost our entire dating relationship over thephone, talking every night for hours. I took an advanced philosophy class totry and understand his life better (it was so hard!). He was a double-major inliterature and philosophy, so he already had grounds for understanding me. The“secrets” to our relationship working were communication and understanding.

There really was no “sticking it out,” in the traditionalsense. I’ve loved almost every minute with my philosopher. He is so easy to love.

I am definitely not a philosopher myself (my intro professorinformed me, gently, that philosophy was not a major that I should ever consider).

Advice:

I think the problem with philosophers finding datingpartners and with non-philosophers who are unsuccessful at dating philosophersis often that you go looking for the wrong kind of person. Is it really so badto date someone who isn’t as “exciting,” but who is a great conversationalpartner? The most successful philosopher-relationships I see are those betweentwo intelligent people—usually in different disciplines.

Philosophers:There are many non-philosophers who would love to date you. Be gentle, but alsobe yourself. If you find that a potential partner “can’t handle” (in areasonable way!) the philosophical part of you, then they probably aren’t theright person for you. On the other hand, though, don’t be that philosopher whoalways drives their dating partners into philosophical corners and attacks. Ihave no sympathy for you if you can’t get that part of yourself under control.

Oh, and don’t be all arrogant and show-offy and patronizingabout being a philosopher. Really. It’s a total turn-off.

Non-Philosophers:Give philosophers a chance; they really mean well. It might help you tounderstand your philosopher better by taking an advanced philosophy class or byreading some basic stuff (I can give you some recommendations, if you wantthem).

One thing we non-philosophers sometimes don’t realize isreally both the blessing and the curse of dating philosophers (my philosopherrefers to this as “volatility”). On the one hand, philosophers are really funto converse with, as they bring a degree of thoughtfulness to a conversationthat is hard to find anywhere else. On the other hand, though, conversationswith philosophers can quickly turn to attacks if we or they aren’t careful. Thewhole trick to getting along with a philosopher is learning how to balance thetwo (it takes work on both ends).

In conclusion, philosophers are wonderful, interestinglife-partners! I am never sorry that I decided to (somehow) gather up enoughcourage to attend that book club meeting.

~The Philosiologist

You can follow me ontwitter (@Philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), or addme to your circle on Google+ (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me anemail (left sidebar). So, are you going to go out and snag yourself aphilosopher this year?

Vacationing with Philosophers

2012-02-11T08:57:00.000-08:00

Many of you northern-hemisphere residents are living inplaces right now where there are actually brisk weather conditions. I’m tryinghard not to be jealous (from the armpit of North America, otherwise known asTexas). So, instead of complaining I’m going to stomach my jealousy and broachthe subject that many of you chilled northerners are thinking about right now:vacations—particularly vacations with your philosopher.

As wonderful a philosophers are to converse with, things canget pretty painful on a long vacation. Philosophers—being habitualcreatures—get antsy and anxious when they’re away from the places where theyfeel safe (amongst other philosophers, in reading chairs, in the library, atusual tables in coffee shops, etc).

Vacations are different from things like philosophyconferences, because vacations are not generally filled with otherphilosophers, new and exciting philosophy papers, and job interviews.Philosophers know how to handle these sorts of things, but they often have ahard time when removed from their comfortable philosophy-world for a while.

So how can you minimize the bad effects that come withvacationing philosophers? Here are some suggestions that work for myphilosopher:

1. Let them bring “work”along.

You know, even if there is no time to work or if yourphilosopher ends up not feeling like doing work, the best thing you can do isto let them (even encourage them) to bring philosophy work along. This workwill sit in the background, reminding a philosopher that if things get too new,they still have the familiar lap of philosophy to fall into.

And if your philosopher wants to just work the whole vacation,try to finagle a deal out of them that they will try and do a fewnon-philosophy things with you a day, then spend the rest of the time doing thethings that you want to do.Generally, though, philosophers will discover that there are fun non-philosophyactivities on vacations and will not mind giving up work after a while.

2. Pick out anon-philosophy book on cd/tape/mp3 to listen to.

Some of you are groaning inwardly when you imagine a 20-hourcard ride with a book on tape/cd/mp3. Even though I was a literature student,even I don’t like listening to books while I travel (it makes me carsick—we haveto turn it up loud to hear it, and I hate loud noise). This is one of thosesacrifices, though, that is really worth it in the end. If you philosopherfeels like they can spend part of a trip engaging their mind, they will be lesslikely to get anxious about leaving the comfort of their philosophy world [Note: My philosopher hates leaving home, butsince we’ve started listening to books on cd, he has reached the point where heactually talks about planning future car trips and doesn’t seem to mind themnearly as much]. Plus, if you travel by airplane, train, or bus, you canset your philosopher up with a book on an mp3/cd/tape player and then you don’thave to participate in the book at all.

Although it’s important to let your philosopher engage theirmind while they travel, it is very important that you do not let them pick out a philosophical book to listen to—especiallyif you are driving somewhere. Remember DUIP?This is very dangerous.

3. Agree beforehand to discuss at least one philosophical topic duringthe trip.

Sometimes the anticipation ofgetting to talk about philosophy with you will help your philosopher overcomethe dread they feel about leaving comfortable places. It’s best to restrictthese sorts of discussions to times when you are driving or when you’re at arest area (no DUIPfor your philosopher).

These are only a few suggestions,but they have really improved my philosopher’s emotional state when we go onvacations. You may complain, “But, Katie, I wanted to get away from philosophy myself! Why do I have to bring it along onvacation?”

Whether you like it or not, yourphilosopher is married to philosophy. Asking them to leave it at home is likecovering a canary’s cage all the time to get it to stop singing: you can makethem stop, but they are going to quickly lose their life-spark because you are squelchingthe thing they are primed to do. It is perfectly fair to set up some boundarieson vacations, but don’t outlaw philosophy entirely.

~The Philosiologist

You can follow me on twitter (@Philosiologist), friend me on facebook(Philosiologist Qed), or add me to your circle on Google+ (Philosiologist Qed).You can also send me an email (left sidebar).

Undergraduate Philosophy Students: A Simplified Evolutionary Outline

2012-02-04T09:54:00.001-08:00

As all of you know, this is the second in my very shortseries about undergraduate philosophy students. Last week, I explored thereasons why undergrads typically choose to specialize in philosophy (foundhere), and this week we will talk about what they become once they joinphilosophy programs.

Non-philosopher parents of new undergrad philosophers, Ihope that you will find this especially helpful.

[As a note: When Irefer to “young” philosophers, I do not mean “young by years,” but I do mean “young,as in new.” This is an important distinction].

Stage One:Starry-eyed wonder/Deer in the headlights

Depending on why an undergrad person became a philosophymajor, they have different reactions at Stage One. The young philosopher whoalready loves philosophy or knows something about it is generally enraptured—it’slike being in a new dating relationship. This young philosopher wants to readeverything they can find about philosophy, talks to everyone about philosophy,and often becomes obsessed with a particular professor (they see this professoras being a wise sage who can guide them on the one true path to philosophical wisdom). They also have a seeminglyunlimited tolerance for boredom. My philosopher can remember reading hugehistory of philosophy volumes late into the night—thirsting to read everythinghe could—in a way that he doesn’t now.

The danger with a young philosopher of this type in StageOne is that they often end up wielding philosophy like a too-heavy sword,hacking down relationships and destroying connections with friends in anattempt to try and use a weapon they aren’t ready for yet. This doesn’t alwayshappen (probably with analytic more often than continental philosophers), but Ihave seen it happen many times. The people most often found in theunintentional path of destruction are a young philosopher’s family members—somerelationships with parents never recover from the beating they take in StageOne.

Parents: it is really important to realize that this stagewill not last forever, and your young philosopher does not mean to hurt you.Eventually, most philosophers move on and become thoughtful, carefulindividuals. If you can just make it through this stage, you will find thatyour young philosopher is much easier to spend time with.

The other type of young philosopher at Stage One is the kindthat didn’t really know much about philosophy, and once they open their eyesand realize what they committed to by joining a philosophy program, thisphilosopher is rather overwhelmed and stunned (hence, “Deer in the headlights”).This young philosopher will withdraw at first and try to process this newworld. They don’t have the confidence to speak up in class, and they may find themselvesoverwhelmed by the hard readings.

This type of young philosopher is much less dangerous toother people, but if they aren’t offered help or made to talk about theirideas, this philosopher may get way too overwhelmed and either leave theprogram or do poorly in classes. Philosophers at this stage need moreconfidence. While the starry-eyed philosopher might be able to keep thingsgoing on their own, the deer in the headlights philosophers needs some socialsupport to continue in philosophy. Having just one friend or philosophicalmentor to tentatively talk about ideas can be a big help to them.

Stage Two: HipsterPhilosophers

After a young philosopher passes Stage One, most of them endup in Stage Two as a hipster philosopher. For those of you unfamiliar with theterm “hipster,” a quick look at Wikipedia(the source of all sources!) will give you a quick history of the term. Itoriginated in the 1940s/50s to descript a counter-culture movement—particularlyin music, but also in clothes and attitude—and is now used to describe a classof people (usually young) who are also into counter-cultural “authentic” stuff.For those of us who like to make fun of hipsters, we often tease them forsaying things like, “I was into Indie rock/suspenders/bowties/mustaches/TOMSshoes before it/they was/were popular.” [Asa note: There is a group on facebook called “Hipsters who hate other hipstersfor being hipsters].

So, when young philosophers reach this stage, they know justenough about philosophy to impress their peers with “sexy” philosophy, and theyoften pretend a bit like they are a unique and incredibly intelligent person(very counter-cultural). Now, of course they are unique and intelligent persons,but any grad student or professor can see that the hipster philosopher reallyknows very little about philosophy.

Some young philosophers discover at this stage that theyeither don’t really like philosophy or aren’t very good at it, but they are soused to the prestige or “sexiness” (in some groups) that comes with being aphilosophy major that they stay in philosophy but never get out of the hipsterstage.

Stage Two is not a dangerous stage, but it is rather annoying.Most philosophers, after they have learned more about philosophy, look back atthemselves when they were at this stage with embarrassment.

There are a few philosophers who never leave Stage One orTwo (or they develop a certain degree of arrogance or unkindness in or beyondgraduate school). I have seen someformer undergraduate philosophy students who don’t pursue further education andget stuck in Stage Two, and then they develop into internet “trolls” or thatperson who shows up at university philosophy colloquia events and asks thoseembarrassingly-bad- questions-that-they–have-no-idea-are-embarrassing-questions.

Stage Three: Soberand Thoughtful

After our young philosophers make it through the first andsecond stages, they reach my favorite stage, Stage Three. Philosophers at thisstage have made a lot of mistakes, perhaps alienated some friends or familymembers, and learned more about themselves and their philosophical minds. Theyhave developed a certain type of maturity that comes from thinking andreasoning about the world.

Philosophers in Stage Three are ready to take on the worldbeyond—either in “real” jobs, in law school, or in academia as a graduatestudent. They know better how to talk to non-philosophers, and are oftenexcellent conversational partners. Parents: This is what you can look forwardto with your young and unwieldy swordswoman/man.

So whatever stage your young philosopher is in, rememberthat with time and patience, your philosopher will (probably) develop into athoughtful and engaging person.

~The Philosiologist

You can follow me ontwitter (@Philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), or addme to your circle in Google+ (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me anemail (left sidebar).

Undergraduate Philosophy Students: Choosing Philosophy

2012-01-28T10:37:00.000-08:00

I thought it might be fun to do a short series of posts onundergraduate philosophy majors. Today, we’ll talk about why students generallypick up a philosophy concentration. My next post will discuss the evolution ofthe common undergraduate philosophy major. There might be a third post aboutcommon career paths for the recent philosophy B.A. [Only if I can make it clever enough. Right now the idea of discussing careerpaths seems much too dull].

Undergraduates become philosophy majors for a very differentset of reasons than graduate students. I was an English major myself, so I knowfrom experience that English majors generally become English majors becausethey either (1) love literature or (2) want to become a secondary schoolEnglish teacher (sometimes both (1) and (2), but sometimes not). And Englishmajors can really do just about anything office-y in the workforce (“Wait, youwere an English major, so you can write andspeak well—plus you can recite “The Lord’s Prayer” in Old English from heart?You’re hired!” [This was basically how Igot my first job]).

But back to philosophers. Philosophy is one of thosetrickier subjects in the Humanities that, on the surface, doesn’t seem toqualify someone for a particular type of job (and students and parents ofstudents are mostly concerned, in the U.S., at least, with pursuing a degree inhigher education in order to get a better job). What, then, drawsundergraduates to study philosophy?

One of my favorite groups of philosophers to work with isundergraduate philosophy majors—particularly incoming freshpersons (first-yearstudents). No matter what class (as in, year of student, not socio-economicclass), I always try to sneak in questions about why each student came to philosophy.Given this data, I’ve come up with four of the major reasons why undergraduate studentsdecide to study philosophy:

1. I just love it.

There are a few—a very few, I might add—something like 2% ofall incoming students and 10% of all current students (who changeconcentrations) who come to philosophy because they just love it. I’ve hadstudents who discovered philosophy through a high school class or from aninfluential sibling or just a simple, intro-level philosophy course somewhere.This type of student doesn’t really care initially about what they can actuallydo with a philosophy degree, theyjust can’t imagine studying anything else. Sometimes, usually because of parentalpressure, they pick up a second concentration in something practical, but thetrue lovers of philosophy aren’t happy unless they are studying philosophy allthe time.

2. I really likedProfessor X’s Philosophy of [Something-Academically-“Sexy”] class.

Some new philosophy majors are wooed in by a particularprofessor or “sexy” philosophy class (Philosophy of Art or Love or Media, forexample). Let’s face it: Some philosophy professors are really, really great atteaching philosophy in an incredibly interesting way (and some are as dull asdirt). These sorts of professors tend to attract a small following ofundergrads who try to get away with taking all of this professor’s classes, butdon’t really adore philosophy-for-philosophy’s-sake in the way that our firststudent does. This second student might also be wooed in by a reallyinteresting philosophy class, but may not understand exactly what philosophy isall about [but who does?!]. This kindof student makes up about 10% of the population of philosophy majors.

3. I hear thatphilosophy students do well on the GRE/LSAT/MCAT/GMAT.

Our largest recruitment pool comes from this type ofstudent, surprisingly (around 60%), and it is completely true that philosopherstend to do very well on such tests. There are some nifty charts here (link),that show how philosophers score on various tests compared to students in otherfields. For those of you who are rather confused about the charts or don’t wantto take the time to study them, I’ve simplified the charts here (click to enlarge):

Exhibit A: How philosophers do overall on standardizedtests.

Exhibit B: How philosophers do on the Verbal/Writing portionsof the GRE.

Exhibit C: How philosophers do on the Quantitative (Math)portion of the GRE.

And finally, the fourth type of philosophy student.

4. I don’t have anyother options.

Okay, so philosophy is one of those subjects that has a difficulttime recruiting students initially (unless they are student (3) who comes inwith a purpose). We tend to attract students to the major after they take acourse in philosophy and either (a) fall in love with it, (b) are wooed in by aclass or professor, or (c) have no other options.

Philosophy often ends up as the most accepting liberal artsmajor because it’s really hard for some philosophers to turn away a hard casewhen this student might become a better thinker/reasoner, even if they aren’tvery astute or motivated initially [philosopherstend to be divided here; one side takes the view that we should keep philosophyprograms small and full of bright students, and one side think that we shouldaccept all of the strays and hope to build them up as great thinkers].

So for all of you parents out there who just discovered thatyour offspring became a philosopher, there is hope. Perhaps a philosophy programwill take your wandering, indecisive child and make them into a thoughtful,reasonable person. Perhaps your student will do really well on the LSAT andlook forward to a great career in law. Perhaps your student has chosen the pathof wisdom and doesn’t really know where this path leads, but they can’t imaginestudying anything else. Whatever the case, you should be proud of your youngphilosopher.

And some fun. A comic that is being passed around by myphilosopher friends (click to enlarge):

~The Philosiologist

Childhood Tales from Philosophers

2012-01-21T09:37:00.000-08:00

I don’t know about the rest of you non-philosophers, but Iam intrigued by the tales I hear from some philosophers (and their familymembers) about how weird they were as children.

[Note: I’m going topreface the rest of this entry by saying that I have years of professionalexperience working with children in the eight-to-sixteen-years-old range, andnone of the children I interacted with had exactly these sorts of dramaticphilosopher-reactions to situations (though there were lots of “whys,” but mostchildren go through a “why” phase)].

So today I thought it would be fun to share a few childhood storiesthat I’ve heard from my philosopher about his childhood, and then encourage youto either ask your philosopher about her/his childhood and/or share your own inthe comments.

Story 1: Newton’sThird Law of Motion Must be Incorrect

My philosopher was in the fifth grade (around eleven-years-old)when his class was learning about Newton’s laws of motion. When they reachedthe third law (“for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction”), myphilosopher knew that this law wascompletely wrong. He envisioned a situation in which a bar attached to amachine could be moving toward another object (say, a very large boulder). Atthe point of impact, this bar would be stopped by the machine such that the bardid not at all bounce off the boulder, in the way that this law of motionrequired the bar to.

My philosopher debated about this with his teacher forseveral weeks in class—refusing to give in until the teacher videotaped asituation where the philosopher pushed another student. She showed him how hebounced back slightly, even though he was the one exerting the force. Despitethe video evidence, my philosopher spent more time trying to explain why theso-called “evidence” proved nothing since it didn’t really challenge thethought experiment as such.

This teacher was so angry at him by the end that she madehim write a long report about Newton, and then made him read it aloud to theclass (a sort of punishment for being annoying).

Could you guess that this philosopher became an analyticphilosopher? [The crazy, impossible thought experiment gives it away].

Story 2: Free-Will, God’sKnowledge, and Impossibilities

When my philosopher was around seven-years-old when he beganto be bothered by questions of free will. He can remember sitting around forhours, trying to reason through ideas like:

Let’s say I move my hand. Does God know that I was going tomove my hand? Did he know that I knew that he knew that I was going to move myhand? When does the circle of this knowing end?

My parents say that I should love God more than them. Howcan I measure how much I love my parents, in order to love God even more? Andhow can I love God when I’ve never met him? I do know that I love my parents,but I see them every day and they do all sorts of nice things for me (like giveme presents and make me lunch).

So, now that you’ve started thinking aboutphilosopher-children, do you see any of your current children on their way tobecoming philosophers? I certainly hope so; the world needs more philosophers.

~The Philosiologist

You can follow me ontwitter (@Philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), or addme to your Google+ circle (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me an email(left sidebar). Forgive me for the shorter entry today, as I am off to paint J.S. Mill's portrait on a living room pillow and tend to my zucchini seedlings.

Habitualness: One Philosopher-Quirk of Many

2012-01-14T10:00:00.000-08:00

So I’ve been away for a while. I have lots of excuses, butthe one that most of you will be able to relate to rhymes with shmrad shmool shmapplications.

[Semi-related side-note: I don’t know how you students inM.A. programs ever get any applications out to Ph.D. programs. Seriously, I hadno life for six months (though I do work at a full-time job, at which we had aparticularly busy semester, which didn’t help). I can’t imagine how you canwrite final papers for your grad classes in addition to preparing a writingsample, studying for GRE exams, and putting together all of the variousstatements of purpose/intent, etc. in time].

Now that I’m not perpetually stressed and sleep-deprived,with GRE words and Petrarchian sonnets dancing around in my head [likesugar plums in the “Night Before Christmas” poem, just in a creepier way] all the time, it’s timeto write again. Off we go!

My philosopher often describes being a philosopher tonon-philosopher this way: lots of time spent alone, studying projects that noone outside of one’s area is interested in. It makes them weird.

The “cute,” weird habits that philosophers develop early intheir careers will only get worse as they get older. Part of learning tounderstand and/or live with a philosopher is learning how to live with some ofthese quirks and accept them as part of the philosopher-package, withoutletting them get in the way of your happiness, too.

I thought it would be fun to talk about one of the moreapparent quirks, and then I’ll give some (hopefully) helpful suggestions abouthow to deal with it.

Habitualness

Philosophers are so habitual.

I know several Continental philosophers who will protesthere that I am being unfair to them, as Continental philosophy has an air ofunpredictability about it, but let me respond that I know many Continental andmany Analytic philosophers, and every single one of them is habitual to anextreme. Here’s a way to test and see how habitual your philosopher is: move,hide, or disrupt something that they use/eat/do every day and see how theyrespond. [This can turn into a really fungame, but you didn’t hear this from me].

I had the opportunity once to view the results of arearrangement of furniture in my philosopher’s department main office. Everyprofessor or grad who entered the office acted shocked at the change, but here aremy favorite reactions: (1) walking in, seeing the change, and freezing in themiddle of the room with a look of fear on their faces; (2) looking aroundconfusedly and not being able to form simple sentences because they were toodistracted; (3) complaining about the change initially, then coming in a fewdays later and deciding that they liked it after all (most philosophers hadthis reaction).

Habitual people have a hard time when familiar things change[“Duh Katie”]. Philosophers aresuper-habitual. How can you lessen the blow? [Note: Some of you philosopher will think that this is patronizing intone, but I can reassure you that it is an attempt at sympathy notpatronization].

1. Prepare yourphilosopher

Explain that you will be making changes a few days beforeyou actually do make them. They will grumble less if they know that somethingis coming.

2. Prepare Counter-Points

Have gentle responses ready when they do grumble about achange (“Yes, it is different, but you can see that it does give us more lightin here, which we needed”). Philosophers are pretty rational people. They willconsider your counter-points to their grumbles, as this is how they understandthings in philosophy-world (philosophy-world is all about points andcounter-points). Besides, it’s really fun to play at their game sometimes.

3. Sympathize

Let them know that you understand that they don’t likesomething. They will grumble less if they see you as an understanding person.

Just as philosophers develop habits which make it difficultfor them to handle change, they can also develop habits to deal with change.Example: In our case, I always try to warn my philosopher ahead of time when somethingis going to change. If he can be ready for it, he will not grumble when thetime comes, and he might even have responses ready for philosophers around himwho do grumble about the same change. [Note:“Grumble” might not be the correct word here, as my philosopher doesn’tactually grumble. Perhaps “protest” or “panic” would be better].

Remember: habitualness is a defense for understanding anddealing with the outside world. Be patient with your philosopher and helpher/him out a little with all of the unpredictableness outside of their littleprojects in philosophy-world. Realize that when they do protest to change, itis often because something is differentrather than because they don’t like something.

~The Philosiologist

Youcan follow me on twitter (@Philosiologist), friend me on facebook(Philosiologist Qed), or add me to a circle on Google+ (Philosiologist Qed).You can also send me an email if you would like to (left sidebar). Thanks toall of you for your concern when I don’t post regularly. Perhaps I’ll evenanswer your

Getting through the first Year of Grad School: For Philosopher-Partners

2011-09-30T09:17:00.001-07:00

[Note: Before I begin, I think it’s fair to warn you that Ijust realized that I’ve been wearing my jacket inside-out all morning, sobefore you take anything I say seriously, remember that you are putting yourfaith in a person who can’t even dress properly].

Sometimes philosophers decide to attend graduate school inphilosophy. Grad school in any subject can be difficult, but grad school inphilosophy has the potential to be Hades—foryou and for your philosopher. This post will be particular to those of you whoare partners of new graduate students.

Granted, some former grad students have expressed to me howmuch fun they had in grad school or about how much current grad studentscomplain about how hard it is when it is, in fact, easy-peasy. For most of youwho claim this, I’m going to file your claim under “selective memory” [and I actuallyromanticize my high school marching band camp experiences], and for the fewthat had an easy time in grad school: kudos to you.

I’m going to say it again: grad school has the potential be Hades—for you and for yourphilosopher.

I think I’ve talked before about how hard grad school is forphilosophers, and I’ve even given you tips on how to help them through the hardparts like the paper-writing season. For once, though, I’m going to addressthis post to you partners of philosophers. This is about doing something for you—not just your philosopher.

My philosopher and I have been down this grad school road afew years (two unmarried; three-ish married), so I feel like I’m finallygetting the rhythm of things. I know that on certain days of the week I justwon’t be able to have a conversation that moves beyond routine conversations(“Sweetie, you need to stop staring at your socks and get dressed so you don’tmiss the bus”). I know that certain days will find him in despair, hunched overthe computer for hours while he prepares for a presentation. I know about whattime of the year to expect him to come home with bags of books and printedarticles and start piling them around his desk.

The first year of grad school is the hardest, I think. Yourphilosopher will be excited about her/his studies, meeting new students, andtaking classes with super-smart professors. Your philosopher will also bescared to death for several reasons:

(1) They might look stupid in front of their peers

(2) They might look stupid in front of their super-smartprofessors

(3) They might not get good grades on their papers

(4) They might fail out of grad school

The first year of grad school can also be hard on you for the following reasons:

(1) Your philosopher might be constantly worried about anyof the reasons listed above, so you might find yourself doing a lot ofreassuring

(2) You will probably find yourself doing a lot of things onyour own

(3) You probably moved to a new area [we moved across thecountry] where you won’t have any friends or family members

(4) The added stress from the new grad school experienceswill probably put stress on your relationship

So how can you survive this first year that your philosopheris in grad school without divorce/breaking-up/maiming/gaining 50 pounds? Hereare some methods I’ve picked up and/or observed that seem to really help.

1. Make your own friends

Duh, Katie. No really; this is important. Your philosopherwill be busy—seemingly all the time—and you will feel left out and lonely ifyou don’t make your own friends. Get out there in the community and join somegroups (I joined an awesome knitting group). You will find that many gradstudent partners (from all sorts of disciplines) end up joining similar groups.I learned after a very lonely first semester without trying to make any friendsthat I was just hurting myself.

2. Consider getting a job

You may have already considered this when you first lookedat the small stipend amount your philosopher would receive every nine months[“We moved to Texas for this!?!”]. If not, consider getting a job—even if it’sonly part time—for your mental health. Seriously. Not only will this give you achance to interact with “normal” people, but you need to feel like you’re alsoan important person making important contributions in this relationship. It isvery easy to find yourself feeling marginalized because the work that yourphilosopher is doing is so important to the field of philosophy.

3. Take classes/Go to grad school yourself

Hey, why not? Why should your philosopher get all the fun?You’re going to be materially poor anyway, so why not take advantage of thistime in your lives to both be poor together, but rich in knowledge (and greatconversations!)?

4. Get involved in the community

My first thought when we moved here for grad school was,“We’re only going to be here a few years, so why should I care about thecommunity?” Yes, you are likely only going to be in a place for a few years,but getting involved in a community is a rewarding experience. Volunteering orinvolvement in community organizations will help you feel a sense of place thatyou might be missing and/or give you a different group of friends/acquaintancesthat you would not have met otherwise. Being an academic or in an academicrelationship can feel very transient. Academics tend to move around and travela lot. It’s very helpful, I think, to develop connections with a community, evenif you’ll only be there for a short time.

5. Be willing and prepared to have difficult conversations

Your philosopher will be stressed and busy and will tend to(not always) let her/his philosophy stuff take over her/his life and becomemore important than you. Grad school becomes for them rather like a new babybecomes to a new mother: time-consuming, demanding, and the most precious thingin the world. You must remember that you are also an important person in thisrelationship. Be prepared to address any feelings you have of being unimportantin your philosopher’s life. Tell your philosopher that you want to spend timewith them apart from philosophy. Remind them that you want them to succeed andgrow as super-philosophers, but that you feel ignored or pushed aside for thenew philosophy-baby. Help your philosopher work out times in the week when theyspend time only with you (no philosophy!!).

[Note: It’s best when having difficult conversations not toattack philosophy or attack your philosopher, even if you’re upset. You areupset because you feel a certain way, not because philosophy is stupid—thoughstupid things have certainly been done in the name of philosophy].

I’ve had academic-partner-friends who just sit on theirfeelings and things go very badly for them. Relationships can be ruined if youdon’t address negative feelings.

“Ok, Dr. Laura, so what do you do if your philosopher won’tlisten?”

Bake cookies. Eat them all by yourself. Hide all of youphilosopher’s books and claim innocence when asked.

Seriously, some philosophers (like any other group ofpeople) are jerks and won’t listen. I don’t really know what to do with thosesorts of people other than reacting negatively, especially to the patronizingones.

6. Eat lots of chocolate

Or other indulgences. Really, it will help you feel better.Plus side: your philosopher will be too busy to notice that you ate half of thecookies in one sitting. Negative: weight gain. Take up running.

After you learn how to cope with these harder things, you’llfind yourself really enjoying the time that you do have with your philosopherwhile she/he is in graduate school. It’s especially fun, I think, to watchphilosophers (yours and others) come into a department so scared and unsure ofthemselves and leave as more confident, serious people who just lovephilosophy.

~The Philosiologist

You can follow me ontwitter (@Philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), add meon Google+ (Philosiologist Qed), or send me an email (left sidebar). I’m goingto be working at another philosophy conference for a bit this weekend, sohopefully there will be more inspirational fun for blog posts. Really, younon-philosophers should attend at least one philosophy conference.

Meet the Parents: Introducing Your Philosopher to the Non-Philosophers in Your Life

2011-09-16T15:21:00.001-07:00

Unless youhave no friendships and/or biological connections with other people (ithappens), there will come a point where you will find yourself in a place whereyou will have to introduce friends or family members to your philosopher. Aswith any other non-philosopher, the meeting (s) could go pretty well orterribly.

Withphilosophers, you have the added “bonus” of nervousness making them do thingslike attack (verbally) or appear super-arrogant. It’s not like they try toscrew up all of your relationships with your friends and/or family; theysometimes just get out of control when they’re nervous.

It’simportant to remember through the meeting process that your philosopher is not a monster: your philosopher is nervous andneeds a little bit of direction and intervention to help the meeting(s) gosmoothly.

Here aresome things to look out for in friend/family meetings:

1. The Licking of Chops

It is likelythat your friend and/or family member will say something that your philosopherreally wants to challenge (i.e. “Politics is always stupid”). Even though yourphilosopher cares about you, your philosopher is likely to lose themselves inthe moment. You will see that glint—you know, the one that says “You justtossed me an easy/fun/tasty morsel of an argument point to immediatelychallenge”—and you will see them itching to open their mouths and attack. Ifyou do not intervene at this point, things will get either very awkward or veryuncomfortable immediately.

2. Research Project Talk

Do not letyour philosopher talk about their research projects. They will be tempted to doso because your friend/family member will probably ask them a question about itand it is very easy to slip into talk about one’s own projects. Because yourphilosopher is nervous, she/he is likely to talk way too long and in way toomuch depth for your unassuming friend/family member to understand. This willmake your friend/family member feel stupid and will make it appear as if yourphilosopher was trying to make them feel this way. Now, it is important to note that yourphilosopher may already have a spiel for explaining their projects to variousgroups of non-philosophers. [My philosopher has at least four distinct spiels]. It’s safe for your philosopher to givethis [and it’s kind of fun to identify which spiel they might use in certain circumstances],but don’t let them add anything beyond the spiel.

3. Playing Philosophy Games

Somenon-philosophers have no problem with playing a few philosophy games (e.g.games including shaving barbers, environmentally destructive CEOs, Chineserooms, trolley cars, etc) . My family is actually really great about playingalong. Some people, though, are really annoyed with philosophy games.Philosophy games make them feel stupid, which makes them feel like yourphilosopher is trying to make them feel stupid. It is best to discourage yourphilosopher from attempting philosophy games until your friends/family are more comfortable withyour philosopher and know that they are anything but arrogant (yourphilosophers are all little angels—like mine—I’m sure).

So, now thatyou know what to look out for, how do you carefully lead your philosopher inthe peaceful and harmonious direction? Here are some methods that I have foundsuper-effective:

1. Talk to your philosopher beforehand

Simple, right?No really, talk through the meeting(s) with your philosopher before yourmeeting(s). Remind your philosophers of what could happen if they are not ontheir guard. Warn them that you will be redirecting if necessary.

2. Make a list of safe topics

Myphilosopher and I will often brainstorm some safe things to talk to new peopleabout. You can often suggest that your philosopher talk about a book that theyare reading which relates to something else a friend/family member isinterested in or a news story (beware of politics, though) or a non-philosophyinterest. If all else fails, offer to bethe conversation-director.

3. Interrupt and Redirect in Hazardous Waters

Really, you’regoing to think I’m being rude and unkind here, but sometimes the best thingthat you can do for your philosopher and/or the friend or family member is tointerrupt the conversation and redirect it onto something else. You’ve seenyour philosopher in philosophy-mode. Philosophers are often unaware at thatmoment that they way they are behaving could be interpreted as being unkind orrude to a non-philosopher. When your philosopher looks back at thatconversation later, she/he will usually be very grateful that you saved themfrom the hazards (if they don’t see this and/or aren’t grateful, then yourphilosopher probably never sees when they are broaching being interpreted asrude or unkind. I’m sorry. There are philosophers like this out there).

Philosopherssometimes forget what it is like to be a non-philosopher. Hopefully, they willtrust your judgment and wow your friends/family. Your friends/family will alsohopefully reach the sort of level with your philosopher where she/he can playtheir little philosopher games and engage them in philosophical discussionswithout hurt feelings and alienation on all sides. And isn’t it cool that youget to be the emissary of philosophers everywhere by making the othernon-philosophers in your life realize that philosophers are pretty great?

~ThePhilosiologist~

You can follow me on twitter(@philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), or add me to acircle on Google+ (Philosiologist). Feel free to email me with questions and/orcomments, too. I try to answer emails in a decent amount of time, but sometimes(due to various elements, the largest one being my forgetfulness) I put offemailing for a while. Don’t’ be discouraged: I will get back to you!

Philosopher Party Personalities

2011-08-26T14:47:00.000-07:00

Welcome back, everyone, to a new academic year.

Last night I attended the first, unofficial grad student party of the school year with my Philosopher. For those of you who might be attending a philosopher-gathering in the coming school year, here are some interesting philosophers to look out for:

1. The Guru

The Guru is a philosopher who has been in the department for a while. This philosopher knows all of the professors, is friends with the staff (and, thus, knows all of the department gossip), and has much advice for incoming grad students/new professors. You will usually find the guru camped out in a corner somewhere, happy to let people come to her/him. The Guru is usually fun to talk to—even for non-philosophers. All it takes are a few questions to get the Guru talking—and they love talking.

2. The Rooster

The Rooster can be either female or male (despite the obvious fact that a real rooster is a male chicken), and they can be either a new or old member of the department. What makes this person a Rooster is the obvious strutting and showing off that this person feels like they have to do to get accepted and/or admired by all of the other philosophers. If the Rooster is new they feel like they need to show off to the other philosophers, and if they are a seasoned department veteran they are usually trying to express their dominance in the department to all of the new philosophers. This usually just turns all of the other philosophers off, because they know what the Rooster is up to. The Rooster will even be a bit more rooster-ish if they drink a bit. Avoid the Rooster, as they are ready to bluster.

3. The Lurking Drinker

The Lurking Drinker (LD) is probably someone who has been around the department long enough to handle drinking a lot at department functions without embarrassing themselves. The LD often lurks from philosopher-huddle to philosopher-huddle, throwing out a few comments here or there but mostly listening to everything. Later, the LD will use the information they have garnered at philosopher functions to their advantage, even though they appear very drunk to the common observer. Be very careful what you say around the LD.

4. The Event Specialist

The Event Specialist (ES) is not only a confident philosopher, but a stellar entertainer (in a hostess/host sense). From day one, the ES will start organizing events and somehow manage to wrangle all of the other philosophers—even the most elusive ones—to attend. The ES is usually a very fun person to be around, and they know how to talk to non-philosophers. I’ve found that I enjoy talking to the ES the most at philosopher events.

5. The Eager Agreer

The Eager Agreer (EA) is not a very fun person to talk to—from a non-philosopher perspective. EAs are purposely vague about the tenants of their philosophical beliefs. They are good at feeding the Guru and the Rooster and pretending that they wholeheartedly agree with whatever one of these philosophers says, but the EA holds her/his ideas very close. The EA does not usually talk to non-philosophers very much, not because they are snobby but because they are just more closeted persons.

6. The Tantalizer

There is at least one Tantalizer in every group of philosophers. The Tantalizer usually breezes into the party late, slapping high-fives and/or shaking hands boisterously. You might think, when a Tantalizer arrives, “Golly, this person is going to liven up the party.” Unfortunately, the Tantalizer only stays long enough to get into one or two very surface-level, “how was your summer break” conversations before breezing off dramatically to another party somewhere or disappearing for several hours in the backyard with a bottle of wine and then leaving.

Whether you’re a philosopher’s friend, family member, or partner, attending philosopher events can be loads of fun if you know what kinds of philosophers to expect. Be careful not to drink too much alcohol (it’s easy to do when you’re nervous), as I have seen this go very badly for non-philosophers. Here are some safe (predictable, but safe) questions to ask philosophers at these events:

1. Which classes are you taking?

2. What year are you in the program (for grads)?

3. Where are you from originally? (Academia brings people from all over the world together)

4. Did you read any interesting books over the summer?

Good luck.

~The Philosiologist (back from a vacation and a hectic August at the office)

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), or add me to your more intimate circles on Google+ (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me an email (left sidebar). I am working through sets of your questions from long ago (I love answering questions/giving advice), which I abandoned earlier for several reasons—the biggest one being a terrible test that begins with the letter G and ends with the letter E (with the letter R in the middle). Now that this nonsense is over and the philosophers are back in town, I am very excited to write more generalizations about all of you.

Pi Diagram

2011-07-14T15:10:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I’m really sorry I haven’t been able to post lately.

[What have I been up to, you ask? I’ve been GRE-ing, freshmen-advising, and researching].

You know how I did an entry once on philosophers and their guilt? It’s wearing off on me!!!! I really feel so guilty every day that I do not post.

To assuage said guilt, I created this diagram a while ago after watching the movie Pi. If you don’t get it, that’s ok. It’s kind of lame anyway.

Fake story behind this weird diagram: I was following a bunch of philosophers around and charting their exact activities (because everything I do is measured and exact), and suddenly I realized that, if you chart the data and create complex mathematical equations, philosopher-activities follow a spiral pattern! It all goes back to pi (as in 3.14 . . .).

[click on the image to enlarge it]

Ok, really . . . I disliked this movie . . . and I'm not a mathematician or a scientist.

I’m answering questions in my spare moments. I almost have another set worked up.

~ The Philosiologist [with a guilty red face]

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist), friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed), add me to your circle on Google+ (Philosiologist Qed) [I am so cool], or send me an email (left sidebar). If you are a famous academic and would like to write me a fantastic letter of recommendation for grad school apps (I’m not doing Philosophy), please feel free to offer your services in an email. I need all the help I can get.

Answer Set #1

2011-07-05T12:43:00.000-07:00

[Gosh! Finally!]

It has been a long time in the blog-world, but I am back after an unintentional blogging hiatus. Not only am I back, but I am answering your questions.

Over the next few days I will be posting answer blogs. I am intending to group these questions by theme. I heartily welcome discussion to these answers, especially in circumstances where my answer to a question is to open the floor to philosophers/non-philosophers (obviously, there are many times when you have much more wisdom or insight than me).

So, let’s proceed with our first batch of questions.

Question 1

How would a friend/spouse/family member best broach the subject of jobs and money? Some philosophers complete their schooling and are content to spend their days reading, writing, researching, and working on projects without actually being employed or actively searching for a job. This may seem fine for a while but after several years, you would think survival mode would kick in and they would make finding a job a priority. Curiously, this is not the case with my philosopher. I've tried unsucessfully (and sucessfully) to talk to him about it. While he agrees that it is time to get a job, he still hasn't actually looked or applied for one. Is this a common problem among the philosopher community? How might I inspire him to start working?

Answer

Several things could be at work here.

1. Philosophers have a hard time transitioning back to the “real world” after they’ve been submerged in philosophy for a while. They got into philosophy because, as you mentioned, they are so happy when they are “reading, writing, researching, and working on projects.” The fact that they may have to enter a realm where people are not interested in these same pursuits is depressing and overwhelming.

2. Your philosopher might not be looking for an academic philosophy job for the terrible (but all too real) reason that there are so few jobs available in philosophy. Perhaps your philosopher looked around a bit but returned dissatisfied and with the resolution to wait it out for a bit. Job prospects (the ideal, tenure-track kind) for philosophers are very slim.

3. It might be a good idea to ask your philosopher if you can discuss the reasons behind why he is so reluctant to look for a job. Perhaps your philosopher is too overwhelmed with the kinds of “real world” jobs on the market and needs some direction. Perhaps they are just hunkering down and waiting for someone they know in the field to recommend them for an interview. Perhaps your philosopher is just really depressed at his prospects.

I would recommend encouraging your philosopher to start applying for some jobs, with the promise that you will back them up if they want to enroll in additional philosophy courses on the side and if you remind them that entering the non-philosophy world is not the end of their philosophy dreams. They can still attend lectures, classes and conferences. Perhaps your philosopher thinks that committing to a normal job means the end of their philosophical study. Assure them that this is not the end! If your philosopher would like to get back into the academic philosophy world, encourage them to work hard on some of the projects they used to work on or are interested in working on.

Question 2

How do Philosophers "rest their brains"? i.e. they spend so much time thinking... so how do they stop and relax for a bit?

Answer

The philosophers I’ve met have a wide array of different hobbies and interests outside of philosophy, just like you and me. Here are a few of the most common ways that philosophers rest their brains:

1. Video games: This is not a gender-biased observation, as I know many male and female philosophers who ‘game. Video games give philosophers a chance to do something with a different part of their minds.

2. Socialize: Philosophers love to get together for dinner, parties, and drinking. While they will often get together with other philosophers, they tend to either talk about “fun” philosophy things or normal-person things.

3. Attend concerts: If you live in a city with a decent local music scene, you will find many philosophers in attendance at such events.

4. Drink: Whatever their brew, philosophers enjoy drinking (coffee, tea, alcohol, etc). While they use these stimulants to work, they also use them to relax.

5. Read books: My philosopher always has 5-10 non-philosophy books that he is reading at one time—even during the busiest seasons. Philosophers love knowledge, and reading is an easy way to gain more knowledge.

Question 3

Philosophers and pets: If we are mostly incapable of feeding ourselves (clearly a spot-on observation), how is it that we all seem to live with cats?

Answer

Ah, yes, the cat question. Pets, especially cats, are very persistent creatures when it comes to things like eating and needing the litterbox cleaned (or needing to go outside). I don’t ever have to tell my cat, “Hey, aren’t you getting hungry?” My cat has made it his personal duty to remind me every time I walk by his food bowl that it is dinner time.

I can see pets adjusting to philosophers and their absent-mindedness extremely well, actually. If a philosopher does not remember the last time that they fed the cat and the cat acts hungry, then they will probably feed the cat, which the cat will quickly figure out and use to her/his advantage (resulting in a very fat, but happy, feline).

Philosophers may not notice their own bodily sensations of hunger, but they will notice a pet that trips them or yowls mournfully near a food bowl or at a door (and if you don’t clean out the litterbox, then a cat will make it very clear to you that it is well past time to do so).

Philosophers, anything to add?

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). You can also write me an email (left sidebar).

~The Philosiologist

Q&A Submission Time

2011-06-17T11:44:00.000-07:00

Some of you have sent me email questions about philosophers over the past few months, which I believe I’ve already answered (if I haven’t yet, shame on me!). While I hope that this has been helpful for you, you often have really good questions that more people could probably also benefit from. One reader had the great idea of asking me to create an entry specifically for questions, which I will answer.

[Note: No previously submitted questions over private messages will be included, to preserve privacy].

So, if you have a question, either about philosophers or about non-philosophers (for example, how might we react in situation X, or what are we thinking in situation Y, or how should you respond in situation Z, etc), please comment with them below or submit them over facebook under the link for this article. Philosophers and non-philosophers can participate in this Q&A time.

If you send me a question over email or in a private message, I will only post it here if you tell me specifically that you would like it posted. I want to keep private questions private, to protect my readers.

If you ask questions about me, I will probably answer them untruthfully, but my answers will be creative. This blog is not about me.

You have until the end of the day on Monday, ~~June 13~~, [I mean, June 20th], to submit questions. I will answer them all in a subsequent blog post (s).

Happy questioning.

[Note: as I write this post, I realize that it could fail miserably. If there are no questions submitted, then I will make up my own, as sad and pathetic as it might be].

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). I also respond to email messages (left sidebar).

~The Philosiologist

What do Philosophers Consume?

2011-06-16T11:45:00.000-07:00

This chart is a 100%, scientific, and accurate* representation of what philosophers consume when left unattended.

(Click on the image to enlarge it).

I hope this helps. You may want to intervene and present your philosopher with nutrient-rich meals every once and a while.

P.S. Anyone interested in a Q&A blog; particularly one where philosophers can ask questions about non-philosophers?

* By "100%, scientific, and accurate," I mean, of course, that some philosophers are like this and some aren't. This note is for the concerned parties amongst the readers.

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me an email if you like (left sidebar).

~The Philosiologist

Philosophers in Love: Where to Find a Philosopher

2011-06-09T13:05:00.000-07:00

So, let's assume that after all of these blog posts on philosophers, you simply have to go out and find yourself a philosopher of your very own. Where might you find one? I've created a graph that might help you in your endeavors.

[Note: This graph is also useful if you have a philosopher, but you've misplaced her/him somehow].

Click on the graph to make it larger.

This is, of course, super-scientific, so please interpret this graph as if it is 100% accurate. [Note: Sarcasm alert!! This is for you, next anonymous commenter who reminds me that all philosophers are unique snowflakes].

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). I also usually answer emails eventually (left sidebar). If you have an offspring or are an offspring of a philosopher and would like to recommend your offspring to write/write a guest blog post about what it's like to be a philosopher's offspring, please send me an email or fb message.

~Philosiologist

Philosophers in Love: Happy Philosophers

2011-06-08T13:18:00.000-07:00

Non-philosophers sometimes assume that because their philosopher is a complex person, that all of their tastes and desires must be complex. This is false. Philosophers do have some complexities in taste, but there are several, very simple things that make philosophers happy. If you are in a relationship with a philosopher, you may discover that they really appreciate these simple pleasures. Here are some of them that I’ve discovered:

1. A reading chair and a work space.

Philosophers do not need huge rooms or fancy furniture, all they need is a comfy place to read (preferably with a table for caffeinated beverages/alcohol and a bookshelf close by) and a sufficient place to do work. When my philosopher and I got our first place, we spent lots of time looking for just the right desk and reading chair. Because of the time we took to find the right furniture, my philosopher is perfectly content and happy to work at home.

2. Invest in a nice coffee maker.

Philosophers generally do not like bad coffee. Encourage them to do some research (philosophers are very good at researching things) to find just the kind of coffee maker they want, then purchase it. Simple, right?

3. Be prepared to invest in “good” coffee.

Once your philosopher gets a nice coffee maker, it would be a sin to make poor quality coffee in this coffee maker. Your philosopher will want to start purchasing good coffee (example: we buy a fair-trade, organic, locally roasted coffee). If your philosopher does not like coffee, perhaps they like tea or alcohol. Invest in quality beverages.

4. Surprise your philosopher by asking them about their research.

Philosophers love talking about their research. It helps if you try to learn a bit about philosophy on your own first, but once you know a little bit, you may even discover that your philosopher’s research subject is rather interesting. I recommend asking them a question like this, “I would love to know more about your research. Are there any parts of it that I might find interesting?” This will make your philosopher very happy (unless they are of the impatient, “Don’t bother me while I work” type). See my post on How to Get Your Philosopher Talking Without Much Effort.

5. Surprise your philosopher with food.

Philosophers are often too distracted to remember to eat food, let alone good food. If your philosopher is a graduate student, she/he will already be a scrounger (one who scrounges for free food), due to the nature of their poverty. Surprise your philosopher with baked goods, dinners out, and favorite snacks.

This is it, really. Some philosophers might like particular gifts or might like to take short road trips, but most philosophers I know also like a few simple things.

Any other simple pleasures I've missed? [Note: Keep it clean, please! Some of your children read this blog :-)]

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). I also usually answer emails (left sidebar).

~The Philosiologist

Philosophers in Love: Funny Things about Living with a Philosopher

2011-06-07T14:09:00.000-07:00

"A wonderful fact to reflect upon, that every human creature is constituted to be that profound secret and mystery to every other."

- From Charles Dickens’ A Tale of Two Cities

Philosophers, being rather strange in many ways (delightfully strange, in my opinion), are very interesting beings to live with. Here are a few strange things I’ve noticed in the few years I’ve lived with my philosopher.

1. Books everywhere.

I like to joke that in our apartment, I can’t ever escape my philosopher’s dissertation project. There are books for this everywhere: bathroom, kitchen, under various chairs, stacked beside the bed. Sometimes I even find his books in my bags.

2. Thinking-hours are kept; not regular hours.

Thinking-hours can be at any time of the day/night. Some philosophers do their best thinking at 2am. Getting used to these strange hours can be cause for some grievous misunderstandings at first, but after a while you learn to adjust to them.

3. Strange eating/drinking habits.

Most philosophers forget to eat when they work, but they do not usually forget to drink, particularly caffeinated beverages. Philosophers can drink amazing amounts of caffeinated beverages when they are working. At my philosopher’s peak, be was consuming two-and-a-half, 12-ounce pots of coffee per day. Because my philosopher will not eat lunch when I’m not there to remind him, I set up a schedule where we always eat lunch together.

4. Forgetting strange things.

You may find your philosopher forgetting strange things like (1) washing the shampoo out of their hair, (2) how to get home, (3) to close cupboards, (4) to go to bed, (5) to match socks before they put them on, (6) to turn in super-important paperwork, (7) to close the front door quickly at night so freakishly large palmetto bugs (huge cockroaches) don’t fly into the apartment.

It is very easy to keep yourself from being frustrated by these oddities by viewing your philosopher as an anthropologist would (noticing what they do and interpreting it as a part of their culture, rather than viewing it as an annoyance to be corrected). Personally, I love these quirks. Philosophers make my life much more interesting than it would be otherwise.

5. The ability to talk about things (especially philosophy) at all times.

Philosophers are very good questions-askers and talkers about many things—normal-person things and philosophy. This does not mean that they are always the best listeners, but this quirk can be worked on. Persons like myself who are not very good talkers can find philosophers delightful beings to share a relationship with, except when they cross lines at times when we would rather have peace. No-talking boundaries are easy to erect with philosophers, though, as they are very sensitive to your rejection of their ideas. As I’ve mentioned in previous entries, a simple, “I’m not feeling up to talking about this right now, but I would be willing to discuss it [at X time],” Is sufficient. It is wonderful to share a life with a person who likes to talk about interesting things all the time.

Please feel free to share any philosopher-oddities you’ve seen.

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me an email, if you would like (left sidebar). Stay tuned for more in my mini-series this week, Philosophers in Love.

~The Philosiologist

Philosophers in Love: Sharing Your Relationship with Ideas

2011-06-06T13:17:00.000-07:00

[Note: Because my philosopher and I are celebrating our third year of marriage this week, I thought it would be fun to talk about philosophers in romantic relationships. I’ve brainstormed and/or collected ideas from readers for a short series of posts this week, dealing with some issues involved with being in a relationship with a philosopher.]

You know that consuming feeling you have when you begin a new relationship—it’s like everything you think or do is about your new fling. You want to be with them all the time. Etc. This is how philosophers feel about ideas. If I’ve not said this outright, I’ve hinted at it before: Philosophers are consumed by ideas.

I can remember one particularly special occasion in the earlier years with my philosopher, an especially intimate one (out on a nice date during the holidays). I was thinking about our future together and all that sweet stuff and he looked especially ponderous, so I asked him what he was thinking about. “I was thinking about how to better teach deductive logic to my next intro class. My previous method just didn’t seem to work . . . [etc].”

Next thing I knew I was reluctantly involved in a two-hour discussion about teaching methods—teaching methods for logic, no less.

Earlier in our relationship when things like this happened, I assumed that I was not interesting enough or that he must not like me all that much. This was false, obviously, and as I came to realize this I developed a mantra that I repeat to myself whenever something like this happens: My philosopher is not only in a relationship with me; my philosopher is also in a relationship with ideas.

Think for a minute about how much time your philosopher spends thinking about ideas, reading about ideas, or talking about ideas with other people? Your philosopher is also likely not just in love with philosophical ideas, but with many other intellectual ideas.

I know some spouses/partners who are so frustrated with sharing a relationship with ideas that they try to require their philosopher to just be a normal person and not think about ideas when they are around. Demanding that your philosopher give up thinking about ideas when you’re around is like asking a cat to give up meat or asking the earth’s core to stop being hot—hello, it’s what they are.

I don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask for a little time to just talk about something that you want to talk about, too, but demanding this all the time is completely unreasonable. Your philosopher probably doesn’t ask you to always pretend to be a philosopher when they are around (and if they do—shame on them!—now is the time to stand up for yourself and remind them that you are an individual, not a philosophy-book).

So here are some fun methods that you can use to continue to develop a meaningful relationship with your philosopher and her/his ideas, because, frankly, those ideas are just never going to leave:

1. Read a book together.

It doesn’t have to be a particularly deep or philosophical book. Part of developing a relationship with someone is having shared experiences with them. In order to know your philosopher’s ideas and your philosopher, reading a book and discussing it can bring both of them out.

2. Attend a play.

Your philosopher may complain about all of the time it will take, the lack of talent in the theater these days, or the fact that they usually don’t like plays, but ignore all of that. Experiencing a play (particularly more serious ones or tragedies) can be a wealth of conversation topics. You, your philosopher, and her/his ideas might end up having a grand time afterward when you discuss this play over ice cream [going out for dessert or coffee afterward is necessary].

3. Volunteer at a local charity.

Helping those less fortunate can open up a whole slew of interesting discussions about certain ideas, particularly social/political ones. Not only will you be able to share an experience and discuss some interesting ideas, but you’re also helping out other people a bit, which is something that we all like to approve of but rarely do.

4. Invite another couple over and play Trivial Pursuit.

Make sure you find yourself on a team with your philosopher, because you two are going to totally dominate the game. Philosophers are excellent at whipping out of the knowledge they’ve accrued for tight situations (survival techniques: when they present papers or teach classes, they have to be able to defend positions immediately). Your philosopher’s ideas-knowledge can be supremely useful for games like this. My philosopher and I are a particularly dynamic team, so watch out [Note: When my philosopher and I played Trivial Pursuit against each other, I did win, but probably because I made more intuitive choices rather than his method of approaching the questions as if the game makers were trying to pull a GRE question on him—i.e. trying to fool him]. This can be a particularly exciting game with another philosopher + non-philosopher couple like you.

So go out there and get to know the other lover in your philosopher’s life. You will have a much more rewarding relationship if you learn how to use it and enjoy it, not to constantly fight it.

Please feel free to add your own suggestions or stories in the comments. I love hearing your philosopher-stories.

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me an email, if you would like.

~The Philosiologist

Philosophers on Breaks

2011-05-30T19:28:00.000-07:00

The semester will eventually draw to an end for your academic philosopher. Now that the papers, classes, grading, and office hours are done, your philosopher will have several full months of freedom. Philosophers generally handle this freedom in several ways.

1. Feeling Guilty

Yes, your philosopher does finally have a little freedom and what do they do? Sit around every day feeling guilty because they are not doing enough work.

Some philosophers handle this guilt by trying to drink a lot and hang out with other free philosophers; some just dink around, powerless to come up with anything to do because whatever they decide to work on must be important enough to work on all summer, which means that they will never decide on anything; or some commit themselves to impossibly large projects, which makes them feel even more guilty when they cannot accomplish all of them.

2. Start Reading Groups

Philosophers love reading groups. Near the end of semesters, you might hear a buzz around the philosophy departments about different reading groups that members of the faculty or grad students are planning on organizing. Almost every philosopher—at one time—commits themselves to a reading group, but it common knowledge that nearly half of all philosophers who do commit to a reading group will actually attend said reading group. Just the idea of reading groups make philosophers very excited.

Those who do actually follow through with this group will commit themselves to many more readings than they can actually finish in a break, which adds to their guilt. My philosopher, in fact, has gone on record for the statement, “Perhaps the most important skill in grad school is guilt management.”

3. Working on a Thesis, Dissertation, or Publication

Most people who are not affiliated with anyone in academia do not realize how much work academics actually do during breaks. Philosophers (and others) tend to keep a mental list of all of the projects that they need to do during the school year, which they are planning to push off until a break. The list is usually insurmountably long, and your philosopher may end up seeming even busier than they are during the semester.

This is often the time when philosophers work on theses, dissertations, or other publication projects (articles, books, conference presentations).

4. Having Lots of Philosopher-Parties

Philosophers generally love to get together and drink and eat. Because they don’t have specific schedules during breaks, you may often find philosophers getting together for philosopher-parties.

5. Attending Conferences

There are many conferences during breaks—especially summer breaks. Long breaks are the chance for long-term conferences, sometimes up to a month long. Philosophers also may find themselves invited to special roundtables or workshops, which are chances for them to spend time with other philosophers interested in their subject area and present and write papers together. Your philosopher may even get paid for attending these.

To spouses/partners of philosophers: Because philosophers tend to either throw themselves completely into projects during a break and obsess over them or do nothing and feel really guilty and depressed, you might find yourself as a sort of floodgate controller. I find myself doing a lot of "directing" during breaks, especially in regards to encouraging my philosopher to attempt new projects when he's in the doldrums and being a helpful shoulder when he's attempted a project that's too large. Bake lots of cookies.

To all non-philosophers: The nicest part about breaks is that your philosopher is a bit more flexible with their schedule than they usually are during the semester. Feel free to encourage (and/or nudge) your philosopher to do something fun with you. Philosophers also like to do normal-people things, but sometimes they just need a bit of encouragement that it’s okay to take a break from their work.

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). I also welcome emails (left sidebar). If you have any suggestions for how to keep green pepper plants from dying in a hot, humid, windy region, please feel free to send these along, too.

~The Philosiologist

Philosopher Fashion

2011-05-26T14:46:00.000-07:00

[Note: Thanks, all, for your patience with my blog-negligence and vacation. On a personal note—though I usually like to keep these posts as impersonal as possible—writing has been hard for me lately because I am having some eye problems. Seriously, I had to set the text at 26 points today to be able to see it, which must be really funny to see on a young-person’s computer. Hopefully, this will be remedied soon. In the meantime, please enjoy the post].

Philosophers, like most academics, like to think of themselves as incredibly unique individuals. You may have noticed that your philosopher likes to consider themselves a person untouched by societal pressures and norms. One thing that philosophers especially like to think they are unique about is their manner of dress.

Philosophers do really tend to dress differently than most non-philosophers, but they still generally fall within several philosopher-dress categories. Here are a few that I’ve noticed.

[Note: There can be cross-overs in all the categories. For example, a Free-Ranger might also be a Same Five Shirts].

Same Five Shirts

This category of philosopher can be combined with any other philosopher-dress category. This philosopher wears the same five shirts and/or same five outfits. Same Five Shirts philosophers have many reasons for wearing the same clothes, among their reasons are (1) lack of money, (2) they only like five shirts, (3) they don’t really care about clothing, (4) they feel guilty about buying more clothes when there are so many people in extreme poverty in the world, or (5) they are really picky about their clothes and have to go to extreme ends to purchase exactly what they want.

Throw-back

They have a lot of clothes, but these clothes may or may not have been popular twenty years ago.

Edgy

Edgy philosophers are often tattooed or pierce body parts besides their ears. They often wear leather, spikes, chucks, and black. Edgy philosophers may or may not die their hair funky colors or shave it all off (this includes females, of course).

Hipster

Oh, hipster philosophers. All of you know what a hipster is, right? Philosophers sometimes dress like hipsters (skinny jeans, black-rimmed glasses, suspenders, TOMS shoes).

Free-Ranger

This philosopher wears organic cotton, hemp, vegan shoes, neutral colors (no synthetic dyes), and/or re-purposed clothing.

Expensive

This philosopher only wears expensive and/or expensive-looking clothing; usually tailored suits. An expensive philosopher will always have expensive-looking haircuts and accessories, too. They will always look their best, even during breaks.

Loafer

T-shirts, cargo shorts, and sandals are the loafer’s favorites. When occasions call for dressing up, the loafer may wear a button-down, short-sleeved, cotton shirt. Sometimes, they also wear loafers without socks.

Messy-Pants

This philosopher always has something untucked, unbuttoned, askew, wrinkled, stained, and/or ripped. They really do not mean to be a messy-pants, but they just can’t help it.

Christian Kid

This philosopher may not be a Christian kid, but they sure dress like one. Christian-Kid philosophers wear very modest clothes such as off-brand polo shirts, cargo shorts, capris, tennis shoes, cardigans, flats, and/or blue jeans. Male philosophers of this variety will always tuck in their shirts. They tend to also keep their haircuts and styles fairly modest and predictable.

Too Poor

Some philosophers are whispers of the previous categories, but are too poor to really follow through completely with the philosopher-style.

What are some other philosopher-dress categories that you’ve seen?

You can follow me on twitter (@philosiologist) or friend me on facebook (Philosiologist Qed). You can also send me an email, if you would like. I am not really answering emails right now because doing anything on the computer is painful, but I will get to your emails soon.

~The Philosiologist